Friday 7 December 2012

Bad to Worse

Well today capped off another week that just finished bad to worse.  I am really looking forward to the week when I can say that it went from worse, back to bad. We are waiting for the plateau of pain, but each week finishes just a little worse off than the previous.  This last week has been a real juggling act with pain management, weight and ulceration.  With the prospect of a feeding tube just 3kgs away, Karen has managed to maintain her weight just with the 4 cans of Ensure Plus.  Sounds easy enough but it has been a real struggle to drink that quantity.  The process of swallowing and talking is getting more and more painful.  It is quite scary to see how quickly the situation can change.  Only this morning at the Doctor Review, Karen commented that her throat was starting to feel sorer.  By early evening this had deteriorated to the point we were weighing up our options to head into the RAH Emergency.  The pain has increased to a point where Karen can not talk without great discomfort.  She is now passing me notes to communicate.  It appears there may be further ulcers down her throat making it more uncomfortable to swallow and in particular to continue to drink the Ensure Plus to maintain her weight to keep the feeding tube away.  The other main concern now is if some of her ulcers join up to become one large ulceration, then they will have to stop therapy to allow that area of tissue to repair before resuming.  So like I said, a real juggling act with consequences of dropping any of the balls.  Someone once commented that, "the trick to juggling is determining which balls are made of rubber and which ones are made of glass."  At the moment it feels like we were only issued with glass ones!

So based on this evening, our challenge is to get through the weekend without having to present ourselves at Emergency.  Ideally we want to get through to Monday when we can see one of the Oncologists and be guided by them.  Best case scenario is that things settle over night and tomorrow brings with it some relief and we are able to continue on.  However we are bracing ourselves for the real possibility of a feeding tube and potentially pausing the therapy or reducing the area that they are treating to allow her mouth to repair.

Its funny reading the previous posts and what we thought were painful periods.  They really do pale in to insignificance compared to what Karen is dealing with now.  This week we are both really done with it all, hitting that point of being physically, mentally and emotionally spent.  Next week being week 5 of treatment, we pray may be full of good news to share.



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